


Drunk Dialed

by supercess



Category: Arashi - Fandom
Genre: Comedy, Fluff, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-24
Updated: 2014-11-24
Packaged: 2018-02-26 21:20:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2666723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supercess/pseuds/supercess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>MatsuJun thought his Friday night would be boring but that would all change when an unknown number suddenly calls his phone and a drunk man answers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drunk Dialed

Friday nights would usually entail staying up ‘til dawn and drinking with buddies until you can’t form coherent sentences anymore. It was the night of fun and the start to a wonderful weekend ahead with no work to worry about.

Matsumoto Jun’s Friday nights would usually be like that, except for that particular Friday. For some reason—meaning his friends being pricks with all of them already having pre-scheduled drinking sessions with different people—he was stuck at home, watching whatever it was that was on TV.

He sighed for the nth time that night. It’s been so long since he’s had such an uneventful Friday night that it felt weird and foreign. Jun picked up his phone and scrolled through his contact list once again for god knows how many times already, trying to find someone he can go out and drink with but ending up with no one since they’re either already out (and turned him down) or someone he wasn’t really close with.

“Fuck you all.” Jun groaned, throwing his phone away angrily and letting it slide on the floor and eventually hit the wall.

He sat there in silence, looking at the TV screen but not absorbing anything from what he was watching. At exactly 12 midnight, he heard a soft noise from the far corner of the room.

“Oh you better not be calling for pick-up.” He said to himself as he crawled towards his phone. Jun checked his phone, curious as to who would suddenly call in the middle of a drinking session since it was already midnight and most people would probably be drunk as shit.

It was a number that he didn’t recognize.

Thinking it was one of his friends or his friends’ friend, he picked up the call, ready to be asked to pick someone up—probably Aiba or Sho based on their track record with him.

“Hello?”

“H-h-helloooooooooooooooooo”

Jun frowned, pulling the phone away from his ear and looking at the number again. It was still the unfamiliar number and he was pretty sure that he didn’t know who it was on the other end of the line. He sighed. He was seriously having a bad weekend already.

“Alright.” Jun started in his annoyed voice. “Clearly, you’re drunk and you’ve called the wron—”

“Mmm. P-preeetty voice. Hellooooo preeeetty.”

Jun groaned angrily, running a hand over his face. There was probably no sense in talking with this man on the other line seeing as he heard a giggle fit happening already. He sighed again, his thumb over the end call button.

“Staaarsh! Many staarsh tonight. The staarsh ‘er hereee!!!”

Jun’s thumb left the button on his phone, a thought crossing his mind. If the drunken man on the line was seeing stars, then it meant he was walking around outside. Being outside and super drunk was very dangerous. He stood up; cursing himself for being such a worrywart even for people he didn’t know.

“Hello? Okay, Caller-san…”

A giggle. “Caller-san...Ohno-san…Ohner-san…Cohno-san…”

Jun shook his head as more laughter came from the other end, apparently being called ‘Caller-san’ was too funny for his phone companion. But at least he finally knew who his caller was.

“Okay, Ohno-san—please stop laughing—focus.” Jun said and finally it became quiet on the other end.

He could hear the sound of distant laughter and conversation, cars passing by, and a bunch of other things. From what he gathered, his caller was walking outside somewhere and probably having no idea what he was doing or where he was going.

“Ohno-san, do you have someone with you?” He asked slowly and calmly. Since this man called him, he’d have to be sure he goes home safe even though he hates that he had to kind-of babysit like this over the phone.

There was a short pause and Jun thought his caller already fell asleep.

“Nah.”

He waited but Ohno-san didn’t seem to have any intention to talk more. “Okay. Do you know where you are? Any idea at all?” He asked again.

Another pause and Ohno-san answered with a giggle, “Tokyo.”

Jun clicked his tongue in annoyance. How was he going to help this man? He hated himself for not ending the call when he could have done so earlier.

“Are you angry I’m sorry I made you angry please don’t be angry.”

Jun was surprised he could catch what the caller said being that he said it all at once. Dealing with drunken people is seriously a pain in the ass. He stayed quiet for a moment before finally having his resolve.

“It’s fine.” Jun replied, running out of other things to say. “Just…I want to help you, Ohno-san. Can you describe where you are? What can you see?” He asked, getting up from the floor and grabbing his coat. Tokyo was a big fucking city, if he’s going to do this, he had to know exactly where this man was.

There was a short pause again and all he could hear was the soft breathing of the man. He didn't even know who this man was but he had the urge to help him.

"Staaarsh"

Jun huffed out a breath, already walking down the stairs of his apartment complex. It was dark out but he was determined to find the guy.

"Yes. I know there are stars. They're pretty, right?" He said, keeping the conversation going so his drunken companion wouldn't fall asleep. "What else, Ohno-san?"

He heard a soft thud and could just imagine his caller slumped on the ground somewhere, alone.

"Konbini."

Jun sighed. This was next to impossible. Convenience stores were on every street corner in Tokyo. He really needed something more detailed.

"That's good, Ohno-san." Jun said, opting to imagining that he was talking to a 5 year old. "Can you see anything else? Billboards? Sign boards?"

"Fiiishhh!!!"

Jun pulled away from the phone after feeling like his eardrums would break into pieces from the scream. "Fish? Is there a fish somewhere? Is it big?" He asked, thinking that maybe he was seeing fish billboards somewhere.

"Mmhmm, big fish! I caught one beforeee, it was good, ne? You were theeere."

Jun decided to play along. Maybe he can coax some more location information by doing that. "Yes, it was big, right?"

"Katshuuuo!"

Another laugh.

For the moment, Jun tried to think of places with images of fish. He could vaguely remember some places having one. He continued walking around, head whipping here and there to avoid missing something.

"Alright, Ohno-san, I really want to find you." Jun said, surprised by how much he meant it. He was definitely worried for this guy. 

"Katsuo is good but do you see any sign boards?"

Jun listened as Ohno struggled to read something for him. He slurred the words and it took a few tries for Jun to finally figure out where he was. Once he knew the location, all he had to do was keep Ohno talking some more and get him to stay awake.

"Okay, Ohno-san, I'm on my way to you. Stay awake." Jun told him. "What did you drink tonight?"

"Sake is good, ne?"

"Yes, it is. Did you drink a lot of it?"

"Mmhmm. Different ones. Bitter. Shweet. Strong."

More laughter.

"Why did you drink alone, Ohno-san?"

"Dunno."

"Friends?"

"Meh."

"Ah, we're the same then. My friends were busy too."

"Mmhm. I'm not busy-" Jun laughed at how his pronunciation of busy became 'bizzy'. "You're my friends, ne?"

"Friend. Okay, yeah." Jun corrected his grammar. "I'm almost there Ohno-san."

"Mmhm. Tired."

He heard a soft yawn and he panicked a little. He still didn't know what this man looked like so he had to keep him awake. Come to think about it, this was fairly dangerous. What if this man was faking it all this time and was actually an axe murderer?

"Ohno-san, are you an axe murderer?"

"Murrerrer"

Jun laughed at how Ohno continued to slur. There was no way this unknown man on the phone was a murderer at all. Just maybe a drunk fool and somehow, Jun was taken in by him. He walked around the corner and finally came to the street that Ohno described a while ago.

"Ohno-san, I can see the store that you said. Are you anywhere near it?"

He looked around for a man on a phone, maybe somewhere slumped on the floor but he found no one. He could hear his caller's silent breathing on the other end and he was sure he'd fallen asleep.

"Ohno-san, tell me about the katsuo you caught."

Pause.

"Big. Mmhmm. Tired."

"Come on, what did it taste like?"

Jun ran around, trying to find the man. He looked around everywhere, finding someone unknown but somehow familiar.

"Good! Really goooood."

"Yeah? Did you catch more?"

"Nah. Tired."

"No. No, stay awake. Did you eat the katsuo?"

"Katshuoooo."

Jun heard it. Not on the phone but somewhere close. He whipped his head left and right but he couldn't see a drunk, sleepy man for miles. He walked a little bit more and finally came upon a flight of stairs. On the bottom of the stairs was a slumped man leaning on the wall with a phone near his ear, slowly falling from his grasp.

"Ohno-san?" He called out.

"Mmhm."

There he was and somehow, Jun felt relieved that the man was safe. His eyes were closed and it looked like he was sleeping peacefully. Jun approached the man cautiously, reaching out to shake his shoulders lightly.

"Ohno-san. Ohno-san, wake up.”

Ohno shifted a little before slowly opening his eyes. Jun didn't know what the man saw when he looked at him but the smile that Ohno flashed him was blinding. He had to remind himself that he didn't know this man so he shouldn't be feeling things for him. That was stupid and overall ridiculous.

He wasn’t the one who’s drunk so he had to stop thinking about stupid things.

“Alright, Ohno-san, let’s get you home.”

Jun helped Ohno get up on his feet, carefully shifting their bodies together to avoid too much stumbling around. Ohno ended up clinging on Jun’s shoulder, his face stuffed on Jun’s neck. MatsuJun tried to ignore the fact that his caller was breathing cold air on his neck because if he focused on it, they’d both be on the floor with one drunk and the other giggling because he was ticklish.

“Ohno-san, you have to tell me where you live. I need directions. You don’t even have an ID on you.” Jun said, trying to shake Ohno awake by shaking his shoulder.

He saw Ohno frown and groan. “Mmhm. Shh.”

Jun let out an annoyed huff. There was only one thing to do then. He didn’t want to leave this guy alone outside especially after he went out to find him. And also it was already 1:30 in the morning.

He hailed a cab, thankful that he had the sanity to bring his wallet with him and after struggling to get Ohno inside; he told the driver their destination. Once in front of his apartment, he struggled to get Ohno outside the cab as well.

He heaved him up the stairs, careful not to hurt him in the process. Seriously, the man looked like a kid who’s had too much to drink but Jun knew that this man wasn’t a kid, he had the aura of a grown up. Maybe he was even older than him.

They arrived at his room with minor injuries which included Ohno hitting his leg hard on the railings and then hitting his head on the door. None of it was intentional at all, just small accidents that Jun couldn’t prevent without getting both of them to fall face first on the ground.

“Ohno-san, seriously, you should bring any identification card when you’re out drinking.” Jun talked to himself as he struggled to drag the guy onto the bed that was on the corner of the room.

Jun didn’t know why he was being so nice. He wouldn’t do this with just anyone but that weekend was proving to be very different than what he’s used to.

“Uwa!”

Ohno suddenly jolted awake for some unknown reason, surprising Jun that ended up with him letting the guy go. Ohno wobbled and fell to the floor, eyes hazy and droopy but still very much awake. Jun looked down while Ohno looked up at him with a confused frown.

“Ohno-san?”

Once he spoke, Ohno smiled again. “Ah~ Pretty voice~ Helloooo.” He slurred again, clearly still piss drunk. Jun shook his head and proceeded to get him up from the floor again, he kneeled next to him but as he did so, Ohno grabbed his face.

Jun sat still on the floor with Ohno inspecting his face. His drunken visitor let out a short laugh. “What? Are you okay?” Jun asked, concerned.

“Pretty voice.” Ohno slurred. His hands went to brush Jun’s hair backwards, leaving his face bare for the guy. “Pretty face.” Ohno said with a laugh, his hands now behind Jun’s head, running through his hair. “Pretty.” He said, his arms around Jun’s neck.

Jun gulped. This was a position that was making him extremely nervous. “Now, now, Ohno-san. Let’s not—”

“Shh. Pretty lips.”

Before he had the time to react, Ohno was too close, too soon. His eyes widened as he felt soft, chapped lips that tasted like alcohol on his own. His heart was pounding while his mind was telling him to pull away because this was ridiculous. He didn’t even know the guy!

Jun was about to pull away and as he did so, Ohno grunted and pulled him closer whilst slowly opening his lips for a better and deeper kiss. Jun’s eyes widened some more at what his caller was capable of with those soft lips and it took all of his will power to break free from the drunken man’s grasp.

What. The. Fuck. Just. Happened.

Jun stared at his caller who was now dead asleep on the floor after he pushed him away hard enough. He ran a hand over his face with a silent groan.

So much for an uneventful Friday night.  
\--

The next morning, Matsumoto Jun woke up feeling exhausted even though he slept properly through the night. He sat up from the bed and looked around his room, thinking that he had a dream which involved a drunken man in his home.

And there he was.

Ohno-san, his caller from the night before was still sleeping peacefully on the floor of his room. It wasn’t a dream at all.

Jun flopped back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. This was probably going to be weird and he just hoped that this guy wasn’t really a murderer. He glanced back at the man on the floor and made a face before getting up to prepare breakfast and some tea for the guy.

It was a few minutes later that he heard a soft shuffling on the floor. He didn’t have a separate room for anything so basically, his back was just turned away from his visitor and he could hear everything that the man was muttering.

He heard silent profanities and complaints about a headache and a surprised intake of breath. Jun knew that the guy was finally awake and in control of his senses. Once he was finished with cooking the eggs, he poured some tea for them both.

“Uhm…” He heard Ohno say before he turned around to face him, cups of tea on hand.

“Tea, for your hangover.” Jun said in his stoic voice. Ohno visibly shrunk back, clearly uncomfortable and a little scared. “Don’t worry, I won’t do anything to you.”

“Ah, no. I’m…” Ohno started, accepting the tea gratefully. “Sorry, I…that wasn’t what I was worried about.” He said.

Jun waited with a confused frown on his face. Ohno stared at him for a bit more before saying, “I’m sorry for last night. I don’t know you but you were very nice and I…” He was suddenly red in the face.

Jun’s eyes widened. Was he one of those who remembered everything that happened to them when they were drunk? He stared at his visitor and sure enough, he couldn’t look at him straight in the face and he was blushing hard.

“Ohno-san…” Jun started, blood also rushing to his face upon remembering the circumstances the previous night.  
Ohno carefully put down the tea and formally bowed apologetically to Jun. “I’m really sorry for doing that. It’s just that I’m a really bad drunk and I swear I was just…I don’t know what came over me.” He apologized.

Jun shook his head, placed down his tea and sat Ohno up properly. “There’s no need to bow. It’s fine. No harm done.” He said. “Drink up, I’m sure you’re feeling a little sick.”

Ohno stared at him for a moment before taking him up on his offer. “Like a train hit me on the head, actually.” He replied, massaging his head that Jun noticed was the side where he hit himself on the door. He felt a little guilty but kept his mouth shut.

Jun stared at the man in front of him curiously; there really was something different with this guy. Even though he was someone he didn’t know, he still gave off a familiar feeling. After finishing their tea in silence, Ohno took a deep breath.

“Ohno Satoshi, 34.” Ohno suddenly said with a bow, surprising Jun again. This guy was just full of surprises. “I don’t want you to think that I don’t have manners.” He added.

Jun was quiet for a while before finally bursting out laughing, leaving Ohno staring at him blankly which made him laugh some more.

“I’m sorry. Just…you’re really weird.” Jun blurted out. “And I mean that in a good way. I mean, you drunk dialled a wrong number and ki—” He stopped. Ohno cleared his throat.

“Well, you’re weird too, coming to get and take home a drunken man that you don’t even know.” Ohno retorted, moving them away from the awkward topic.

Jun looked impressed as he nodded, he liked this guy even more. There are only a few people who can talk back to him like that. He was definitely impressed. And interested.

“Matsumoto Jun, 31.” He replied which surprised Ohno this time but Ohno smiled and nodded. “How about some breakfast first before I interrogate you on why you accidentally dialled my number?”

“I guess I’ll have to ask you why you came to get me too.” Ohno replied with a challenging smile.  
Jun nodded before getting up to get their breakfast. This was definitely going to be the start of something interesting.

“I’d never thought I’d say this but thank god for my boring Friday night.” He mumbled to himself before turning back to Ohno who was already wearing a blinding smile.

**Author's Note:**

> Another dumb Juntoshi one. These are my babies. Haha. I don't know how I came up with this at all. Just on a whim because I wanted to write something. So, excuse me if it's dumb and doesn't make sense. :)


End file.
